So this is what are beloved Hollywierd residents are getting up to. From making those dollars to random ratchetness. They always give us stuff to talk about.
Beyonce is running the world in the new Asian Toyota ad. Her team knows how to get money. I am not against “artists” branching out and doing different stuff with their brands but there is something really endearing about those artists that you just know for one thing.For example my shero, Helen FolaSADE Adu, I loves me some Sade. When you think Sade, you just think music, great music period, you don’t think Blue Ivy or perfume or Pepsi see where I am getting at? But she can go and get hers. Boggles my mind why the rich crave more money when they can afford to not work ever in their lives and still bawl like Naija’s at Hush.
Gwyneth Paltrow & Chris Martin have called it quits. I saw this coming, rumours have been doing rounds for a while now. I just feel sorry for Apple & Banana now they will be forced to live between two continents. The families recent LA move was an alert because word is Chris never wanted to move to LA. See these are the things you talk about on date number 5. Where do we live if we get married? Goodluck to both, looking forward to the next Coldplay album, can anyone say inspiration? Wonder who’s side Jay-Z & Bey are going to take, cause we know what side they would be on if this was Kimye. In complete randomness did you hear the latest news that Bey and Jay-Z have been using “soccer” ages. Word is He is allegedly 50 and shes 35? In their case I really don’t give a gwinya how old they are like it’s going to buy me a streetwise two at that time of the month. A proper side-eye to our celebrities who are always forever 21 when beeshes be 30, child please get your menopause meds.
Ladies we have to talk about this one. Listen! Alicia Keys was spotted on vacation with her family, thus kid, step kid and Swizz Beatz ex-wife Mashonda. Not only that but they were kissing in front of Mashonda. I have always maintained that No one steals your man away from you. Men aren’t panado’s. For a marriage to end y’all both are responsible for it not working one way or the other – lets own our shit. Must be awkward though after those interviews Mashonda was giving. Maybe they are doing it for the kids? Probably getting along to get along. If Russell Simmons and Kimora can do it well it should be doable. Would you? Chill with your baby daddy with his “new” wife whom you accused of wrecking your home?
I wouldn’t be a “stabane esi’ stout” if I didn’t indulge in some Gaga from time to time. Don’t get it twisted I aint no monster. I am too pretty to be one, LOL. Lady Gaga has a new video out from her Artfloppop album, G.U.Y and she features The Real Housewives Of Beverly Hills playing her band. The video also features Bravo head-honcho Andy Cohen who’s gayer than gay sex. I love the art of it all, in that regard Gaga DELIVERS I have to say though I miss Gaga circa Paparazzi but people grow and progress right? Or do they lose the plot like Zamajobe? Remember Zamajobe circa Ndawo Yami? Ja ne & then Lira took that thunder and did a Usain Bolt with it.
Ciara is about to pop and she had a star-studded baby shower with besties, Kim Kardashian, Lala Anthony in attendance. I have to say, Ciara is wearing her pregnancy well. I still don’t get the whole baby-daddy, multiple baby mama thing but to each his own. Side bar: Is Lalla Hirayama pregnant? Am I late or is her period VERY late?
So Ashton Kutcher and Mila Kunis are pregnant. That’s the way to go girl. You are smarter than Jessica Biel, you know the only way to hold on to those millions is through a seed. Even if her career had to fizzle today that child support money would keep her afloat. Poor Demi Moore & her rotten eggs, can you imagine the hurt.
Speaking of cash cows, Basketball Wives star Evelyn Lozada just gave birth to a baby boy with her PAID football player fiance. This chick needs to write a book about how to trap a rich man. I’m sure Khanyi Mbau (and a lot of us) could use some expert advice. Look at how this child is spoiled already – pumped up kicks.
I don’t know what’s up with Madonna but this shock therapy is pure bafoonery. She recently posted this picture on Instagram with the caption “Long hair don’t care”. If your mum posting this ridiculousness what are you supposed to post?
I can’t even TJO on this image of Jamie Foxx. As for this he-she gogo, “Gogo how ratchet can you get, gogo how ratchet can you get” *ecula*
Remember Charmed actress, Rose McGowan? This is what 40 looks like girls & gurls. Forever shutting down 21 year old beeshes since 19-voestek.
Your Thoughts?
By @audacioustoni
Rose McGowan picture courtesy of @wireimage