I saw a friends BBM status about a first date and I got inspired to write about some of the interesting a few things first date.
The Date
Know your date. Know them in terms of what kind of person they are. Makes it easier to figure out other details if you know their style, likes, dislikes in case they are the ones that suggests or decides on the venue. You don’t wanna show up at “Northgate Mall” in your best Bree Street Herve Leger dress and towering heels; and he takes you ice skating. If you don’t know them too well don’t play the surprise me game. Know where you are going.
If you don’t know the person at all, blind date/ internet date/ DM thirst date (don’t laugh stats say that 3 in 5 gay/lesbian couples meet online) make sure the person isn’t a creep in all forms of the word. If I am meeting someone for the first time and they happen to pick me up I always try and get their picture and number plate so I can send it to my friend in case I disappear. Kuse Jozi lana – you have to be careful. How’s that for an awkward first encounter?
If you’re meeting this complete stranger at an agreed (safe/public) venue I suggest you arrive early or a little late, politely late. I like seeing what the person looks like first before they see me for different reasons. If they don’t look like their “photoshopped picture” I can always walk away and call with an excuse or I can always go sit down and ask them to get the drinks until they start looking their “photoshopped picture”. In case they look hot you might wanna go to the bathroom and make sure you look a little snatched, gay boys more zambuk, girls face touch-up, straight men do sit-ups.
The Venue
This might sound selfish but if you can, always try to pick the venue. It gives you a little bit of control over the situation. There’s one thing I always like to do, googling the place & menu or whatever you can to get an idea of prices. This helps at that time of the month when 20c’s become a big part of the paying currency or if you are on a budget. You don’t want to go somewhere and be crying fowl when the bill comes. A friend of mine went on a first date at The Michaelangelo as per the guy’s suggestion, they ate and they drank; and girlfriend was tweeting about how she was being wined and dined until the bill came and Mr. Man said “We are going dutch right?”. Let’s just say it was the 22nd for both of them and there was an ABSA cash-send that was done.
Do’s & Don’t's
DON’T – drink too much on a first date. I don’t know about you but I love me some white wine and after 4 glasses I start getting animated. Aint no first date got time for that.
DON’T- let the date pick you up, especially if you are uncertain how it will all pan-out. It limits stalkerization probabilities.
DO- arrive on time or politely late so you can do the check-up.
DON’T – order anything on the menu that you are not familiar with & pretend that you are. Let’s not embarrass ourselves.
DON’T – go to a first date without money to cover your bill/transport or without airtime, just in case. Dish washing is real.
DO – dress appropriately. Nothing irks me than someone who shows up dressed as if they are going to an entirely different place when they know where they are going. I once dated a hippie who came to a dinner date bare foot. The things that we put up with for ucansi olumnandi.
DON’T – stay for more than 3hrs, that’s when ratchetness comes out to play especially if there has been alcohol involved. Besides it’s nice to ask for the bill and leave before the awkward silent moments start to happen.
DON’T – go dutch if you didn’t suggest the date. There’s nothing as pathetic and bringing out calculators on a date. Maybe I’m biased because I don’t subscribe to dutch. Also if you like the person let them pay and offer to pay the next time, thereby securing a next date. If you don’t then I guess dutch it is.
Do – lahla makuvuma!
What’s the most interesting first date you have ever had?
By Dr. Nton Nton
(Qualified 1st Date Expert after having 29 first dates in 2013 alone)