It’s a big showdown when stars grace magazines. Let’s see our latest cover girls.
Kar-Ri-Ray covers April’s issue of Annex Magazine in lackluster fashion. I like the blonde here but the cover looks like a poster. In the magazine she talk about being a star in her own right. Cough! Her reference point is Chris Brown. If we remove Breezy from the equation do we even know what she does, most of all do we even care? She can just fade into irrelevance or date another celeb. Girl bye!
Me loves JLo’s InStyle cover. I have to say in as much I think she’s a brand with 23.1% singing talent, this woman knows how to stay relevant. She also knows how to keep it cute, young and flirty. After all they say you only are as young as you feel. Side bar for some reason I can’t picture her and Casper getting it on…besides dancing. He looks too much like a pug. Imagine a pug trying to hump a fox – I rest my case.
SJP is a fashion darling as usual on the UK’s Harper’s Bazaar. I hope it’s true that Anna Wintour is grooming her to be the next Vogue editor-at-large, if they are going the celebrity route she sure is on top of the list. Let’s not forget how Carrie’s ratchet love life influenced fashion in Sex & The City. If they don’t go celeb route though, I hope Grace Coddington or Andre Leon- Talley take the post. Only issue I have with Andre is that’s ngathi unuka is’bunu.
Girls star, Lena Dunham is showing everyone what owning your thickness is on the new issue of Glamour. She has an Anele air about hair – I love.
Shakira has been on a roll with covering magazines. She has had at least one or two covers every month since the year began. I am glad it’s good seeing some people win. She is one of those people I want to see win all the time – hell those hips should just automatically make her win. She is totally killing the other judge from rival show aka JLo. Hips winning over a$$ who could have thought? I just realised now how many things they have in common and also how different they are. Asides from having toyboys these two did strike me like those girls that will either marry or make babies with guys from their own culture. Clearly keeping it caliente.
The Queen who deserves an Oscar for best model to ever walk a runway, Naomi Campbell is Shape’s magazine latest cover girl. How banging is that body- this is what I call witnessing the fitness. Damn! That cover would have just worked with Naomi’s pic and a one liner ONLY “Naomi Campbell slaying since her existence”. We all know she has been slaying, and “slaying”. From body and skill to slaying with her phone. You see ladies you cannot let having no hairline courtesy to “operation look cute” stop you from slaying. This is why the fringe was made…well that’s asides from making sure that girls like Rihanna & Tyra do not have solar panels.
Just FYI- the previous cover of Shape saw granny Sharon Stone baring her cookie. I have to say despite having been in existence for so long , that cookie still has it’s “basic instincts” – showing itself. I think it just goes around singing “akuzofihlekile okungeke kuvele obala…” – and they say Toni Braxton has vintage kuku? This is the head-girl of vintage kukus. Ms. Stone does look amazing for her 56 years.
Speaking of vintage cookies, Baywatch babe Barbwire, Pamela Anderson recently posed nude for French magazine in celebration of her first Playboy cover which was 25 years ago. As much as I applaud her for looking good at her age and yes she should flaunt it but not like this. Pam has teenage sons who are still high off hitting puberty & that’s inappropriate. Imagine Monday conversations at school with their friends? “Dude saw your mom’s a MILF” #Ratchet. Let’s not forget the side-eyes from all the other moms when she drops them off at school. Can we just use our two chest balloons to float to oblivion please?
Your thoughts?
By @audacioustoni